Dealing with endometriosis

*****Possible trigger warning for those affected by this disease*** Endometriosis; it effects an estimated of 1 in 10 women. I am just one of these women. This disease has affected me since I was 16 years old and thankfully I got diagnosed at an earlier age than most. Not only did it affect my school life, work life and social life but also my personal life. 

I was 16 years old, 6 months into having my monthly war with my body I noticed that the pain was getting worse and worse each month it came. I felt nauseous, sore and just really down in the dumps. 18(ish) months on and I finally went to the doctor and they finally recognised the pain I was in every month. A couple of ultrasounds later they diagnosed me with endometriosis, my treatment consisted of, monitoring of the cysts I currently had, nurofen, ponstan, heat packs and rest for that week I was ill.

After awhile I honestly felt like I wasn’t being taken seriously and was finally referred onto a specialist to do a laparoscopy operation. After months of being on a waiting list I FINALLY got into my specialist and 6 months later I found out I was going to have a baby, much to my specialist surprise. This then put everything on hold and my symptoms went away for the 9 months of pregnancy. About 3 weeks after Xavier was born I got the dreaded monthly war back again and basically it was hell from there. I was back seeing specialist again and now currently on the waiting list AGAIN for the lap operation. Currently I’m taking a combination of nurofen, ponstan, tramadol, tranexamic acid, endep and the highest estrogen pill they can get me on as my treatment until I go under for my laparoscopy, hysteroscopy and d&c (yep all 3 surgeries in the one go whoohoo!). It’s a monthly struggle and the only time I really feel any relief currently from the pain is the 3/4 days I have before I’m fertile. Luckily enough I have plenty of support from my partner who lets me complain about how much pain I’m in (I’ll honestly give him a lot of credit for listening to me ramble on about it!). He heats up my heat packs, gets me my pain meds and offers to help out with the kids when I’m in pain so I can lay down and rest. The only thing that can really get you through these crappy times is having supportive people around you.

I live in a constant worry of what this disease is doing to my organs and most of all my reproductive organs which at my young age of 23 I shouldn’t have to even worry about. I always have that worry that in the back of my mind that I won’t be able to have more children, which is really upsetting as I want nothing more than to give two little boys a sibling and to have a baby with the person I consider my soul half. I can’t wait for the day I no longer have to complain about pain and no longer have to worry about having the opportunity to hold another little tiny bundle of joy in my arms that’s half me and half William. But for now I’ll get through this sh!t time, focus on the good things I have going in my life and keep positive thoughts about one day having the chance to feel baby kicks again. 

I urge everyone who feels unsure or uncertain about the period pain to get it checked and don’t give up on having the proper diagnosis!!!

The basic ‘run down’ of this disease is, endometrium tissue (basically the lining of the inside of the uterus) is found outside the uterus. This causes inflammatory which then leads to scar tissue that causes damage or cysts that can either be removed by a laparoscopy operation/s or some have more long term damage which result in the need to take reproductive organs out (hysterectomy) . 

https://youtu.be/MEh0egZJf58  (video link to 'endo & us' video which I personally really urge female's to watch.)

The scar tissue or cysts cause immense amount of pain (I’m talking childbirth like or sometimes I could say it’s worse than popping out a newbie) in your pelvic area where your uterus and ovaries sit. The pelvic pain then leads to lower back pain which basically makes it hard to do any physical task.

There are a lot of symptoms to this disease and it occurs differently to everyone. Some notice or have severe pain as a teenager/young adult and some may not experience any pain until they’ve finished having kids. This disease affects women in so many different ways. Many go undiagnosed as there is a lack of information and research on why this happens and how it happens.

Thankfully there is more and more research and diagnoses happening each year and slowly it is becoming more of an apparent disease rather than a ‘normal period type pain’ which I myself got for 2 years before finally being taken serious after much whining about how I was struggling to get to work for that week once a month, each month. 

 Im really passionate about this disease becoming more aware to women!

There are a lot of events going on for endometriosis awareness month which is the month of March. Please visit http://www.endometriosisaustralia.org/for more information on these events and more information on this disease.

10 things to live by when you're a toddler..

10 things to live by when you’re a toddler…

 1)    Make sure you always make things more difficult for your parents, kick up a fuss about your shirt, the way they’re tying up your shoelaces or the food they’ve put in front of you to eat. 

2)   While we’re on the subject of eating, NEVER eat anything more than 2 days in a row, make your parents think you love a certain type of food, eat it fast! Make sure you even finish the whole plate then tell them you don’t like it anymore and refuse to never ever eat it again.

 3)   Don’t act like you are a well behaved child, make sure you say no to everything and don’t be afraid to chuck yourself on the floor in the supermarket or even try asking for a toy car over and over until you get the car because trust me you’ll get the car with enough crying involved.

 4)    Hold your bladder until the most inconvenient time, then half way through grocery shopping tell your parents you need to go to the toilet, make it a sudden request that needs attending to immediately. Your parents MUST drop everything, once you’ve arrived in the toilet pretend to go because you didn’t really need to wee at all you just got sick of grocery shopping. Any excuse is a good excuse when your two years old.

 5)   If your asked to do something make sure you repeat what you were asked in a sarcastic voice until they laugh, they’ll soon forget what they were asking you because now your being funny. 

6)   Always choose your own clothing and if you aren’t allowed to wear gumboots in the bath make sure they know your upset about it with another tantrum, after about 10 minutes they wear down and you get away with it and if you don’t then make sure your next tantrum is worse than the last one. 

7) Nothing like a public place to shout out that you need to use your bowels, that mummy has a big bottom, do a big burp or even for giggles put your hands down your pants and shout out im touching my doodle. It’s a real crowd pleaser! Except for my parents because they’re the fun police.

 8)  So you love a certain tv show or movie? How about you watch that bad boy over and over, demand that you have to watch it and if the answer is no you know what to do, that’s right! Another tantrum! 

9)  If your parents need a break and put you down for a nap NEVER sleep more than an hour, if they seem in a rush to go somewhere that’s when you nap hard 2-3 hours should do the trick! 

10)  So your parents are ignoring you, they’ve had enough of the tantrums and they’ve stop listening to you. This is when you yell out very loud, why are you not talking to me?!? What are your ears for?!? This is the best way to get a reaction so they know your still here, still having a solid tantrum.

a lazy thursday

Today started like any other day, early. For some reason today I'm lacking any energy or motivation and I could basically hibernate like a bear for months and probably still feel tired when I woke.

We've had a really lazy day, hot chocolates and toast for breakfast followed by a HUGE 3 hour nap on Xavier's behalf, I managed to sneak in a quick 30 minute nap and shower, the rest of the time I'm not going to lie I sat on the couch and watched trash tv while looking over at my killer folding pile hoping it would fold itself. Probably explains why my behind is growing to the size of Montana and why the zipper on my jeans apparently no longer wants to do up. I say this while dreaming of the chocolate frappe I drank (and regretted afterwards may I add!) late the other night. Xavier woke and now he's had a bath, had some food and seems to be in a better mood then what he was like before he had his nap, picture the gremlins when they turned naughty, that's Xavier when he's tired. While I'm on the subject of gremlin, what is it with boys and their private parts, nobody warned me how intrigued and abundantly funny it is to have their hands down their pants all the time. Apparently its even funny to put toy cars, really anything that can fit inside his underwear and tell me its 'hiding', so gross! Picking his nose is also a favorite as well as letting go of any sort of tummy gas he has while we're playing on the floor and suddenly its a great time to sit near my face. I don't think any sort of warning or prior information on how having a boy would really change my way of life would have helped. Its crazy but I love my little squashy boy more than chocolate frappe's and boy do I love those!

Lately

 Things have progressed for us in a fast rate as of lately, Xavier is now fully toilet trained and I personally feel like a super mum and total bad ass for achieving that hefty task although I'm still not a huge fan of having to wipe his behind region (and never will be!). His speech has also progressed quite quickly along with his attitude, threenager is definately a thing, people don't joke about these sort of things and it's 100% down right mind boggling.

Shutting himself in his room when he decides to be in a huff about well anything he decides to at the time really, could be because his socks are red and not blue or could even be that we're not going to the play center. The play center tantrum happens pretty regularly nowadays along with the fussiness of food. So basically I've just made having a toddler sound like a hard task at hand because yep it sure is! But I wouldn't change it for the world and I know all these things are temporary (hopefully that goes along with my insanity from watching too many toons a day). Along with all the tantrums, fussiness and big mess comes along moments of pure bliss which make the hard times a little less dysfunctional. Xavier is an absolute crack up, he makes me laugh very regularly and sometimes I cant get over how smart he is becoming. He does so many things that make me smile like making beds for his rabby or making pretend cakes from his pretend oven for me, all of these things contribute to something pretty darn special. I could write a list for days of all the things he does that make me feel like sunshine on a rainy day but the one that tops it is our bedtime routine, cuddles and I love you's. I don't even have to say it first anymore, so even on my bad days where I feel like a total failure, I hear those three little words from my special little person and I know I'm doing something right. Here is a few photo's that I've taken with my canon the last week since finally getting off my tush and formatting my card, for those people who have asked me in the past what lens I use its a 50mm and I eventually plan on getting a different lens as this one is really only the best for portraits. Although I'm not a camera expert so don't quote me on that information, its just what I've found personally.